Friday, 11 December 2009

On Selfishness

She sat there and told me 'Death is not as bad
as heartbreak' and I was so angry I bit my fingers
all the way down. That she followed it up with 'Grief
is very selfish' was no real surprise; if I knew how to use
my tongue I would have told her then.

My Priest asked me 'Are you not crying at all or
can you not stop crying? Tell me which it is so
I can explain that that is the perfectly normal
response.' (this exchange would be perfectly plausible
if I had a Priest, but alas- I have no God, and no
mouth to call him with.)

It is hard telling people, naturally, there are many
times at which it would be inappropriate-
I imagine telling them over vol-au-vents. Salmon
and lemongrass half-way to their mouths they freeze,
tongues glutted, and I down my champagne with a
flourish.

As if you are my trump card.
As if I do not remember your arm around my waist
and how that felt.